So sick of loss

We made the awful decision to put Ryley down on Wednesday.  My heart aches. My soul hurts. The tears have not stopped falling.  I have been so strong through the loss of Cole, Cate and Jaxson. But I believe I am at my breaking point. 

Sam and Murphy

I hope these two become best of friends as Sam grows up.  Oh, how I wish I could read Murphy's mind!

Forever Family

Dear Sam,
  You are forever ours as of  March 18, 2010 at 9:15 am.  It was a beautiful sunny day as we entered the courthouse knowing that you would be ours forever.  We are honored to be your parents, Sam.  You single handedly change our lives as well as those who love you.  Your Papa and Grandmama are crazy about you as is your Grandpa and Grandma.  Today, they told the social worker thank you for bringing you into our lives and how much they love you.  You fell asleep just as we went into court.  Mommy cried as the lawyer asked if I was willing and able to be your mom and if I would take care of you.  I could not ask for a better job in this lifetime than to be your Mommy.  Daddy is a very proud Daddy.  He also could not ask for a better job than to raise you and be your Daddy.
We also want to thank your birthmom, R, who gave us this fabulous opportunity.  Without her we would not have you.  She is a beautiful woman, Sam.  A woman who made me a Mommy and your Dad a Daddy.  She is unselfish and I hope one day you can meet her.  We will teach you about her when you get older.  You will know how much she loves you.  She is my hero.  I thank her daily for you.  I especially thank her today.
I also know that today Cole and Cate were there in spirit.  I know they were happy as the judge declared us as a forever family. 
May you always know how much we love you.  May you also know how loved you are by many people.  You are loved beyond words and today was the third best day of our lives.  We can't wait to see what the future holds for you and watch you grow knowing that you as of today you are ours forever.
All my our love Samuel,
Mommy and Daddy

Six months

Dear Samuel,
Yesterday, you turned six months old!  I can't believe you are half way to a year old.

Look how big you are! 

Ouchie!

The aftermath 

What difference six months makes!

8 days old.  1st Doctor's appointment after leaving the NICU.


                                                       3-08-2010 6 month appointment

Happy 6 month Birthday, Sam! It seems like yesterday we were bringing you home at 5 lbs 3 ozs and today you are 16 lbs.  We love you little man!

Walking with Isla and Rakelle

Our first walk with Isla was a blast for both Sam and me. Sam loved being outside as always and Isla makes me smile. I hope this is a weekly walk.

I love this little boy!